Thursday, February 18, 2016

Gilda-Gram® - "Friendships Enhance Your Already-Strong Inner Self." by Dr. Gilda Carle

Jason Merritt - Getty Images
Jason Merritt - Getty Images 
Gilda-Gram® - "Friendships Enhance Your Already-Strong Inner Self."

If your friends gossip about you behind your back, put you down, criticize you, and make you feel bad, they are not enhancing your inner self.  To enhance who you already are, friends should build you up, encourage you to pursue your dreams, and give you a general feeling of joy when they’re around you.  Overall, they should be able to do more for you when you’re with them than you can do for yourself when you’re alone.

Even if you’ve had a friend for a long time with whom you have closely bonded, other people, events, and things can often get in the way.  For example, a new girl moves into your class, and you find that you want to spend more time with her than with your best friend.  Or your parents have you on early curfew, but your friend’s folks think it’s okay for her to stay out ‘til midnight.  Or your friend has hooked up with a new guy who she is always with, and you feel like you’re out in the cold.  These situations can cause rifts between you and a friend, even after you’ve been together for many years. 

Changing your friendships might not feel comfortable, but it’s a fact of life.  Changing our likes, our wants, and our tastes is part of the way we grow.  Consider this: When you are 22, do you want to still think as you did when you were 12?  Of course not!

Even though people keep changing and developing, in order for a friendship to last, it must be nurtured by both friends.  If two people want to get together, they must create time for each other, even through the distractions.  If their schedules are packed, they need to arrange times in advance, so they can continue to enjoy the activities they always did. 

DR. GILDA CARLE (Ph.D.) is the media’s Go-To Relationship and Life Style Expert, serving private clients worldwide as their Performance Coach at www.DrGilda.comShe was the therapist on TV's Sally Jessy Raphael show, has conducted Relationship Wellness training for Columbia University Medical Center, and hosts TBN TV shows.  As President of Country Cures® at, she uniquely applies Country Music to train Homeless Female Veterans in Civilian Success Skills.  She is also a product spokesperson (Hallmark, Harlequin, Sprint, Cottonelle, Galderma Pharmaceuticals,, etc), keynote motivational speaker, Professor Emerita, and author of 15 books, including “Don’t Bet on the Prince!” (test question on “Jeopardy”) and “How to WIN When Your Mate Cheats” (literary award winner from London Book Festival).  She wrote the weekly “30-Second Therapist” column for the Today Show, the “Ask Dr. Gilda” column for Match, and she was the therapist in HBO’s Emmy Award winner, “Telling Nicholas,” featured on Oprah.  She hosted MTV Online’s “Love Doc,” and was the TV host for Fox’s “Dr. Gilda” show pilot.